Australia's Broadband Internet Connection - What a Joke

What we have is a fully developed rich country on the verge of a commodities boom but unable to provide it's people basic internet connection. Yes I'm talking about Australia and not Thailand or Cambodia because that's how bad it goes to be able to find a country whose internet provisions are as bad as Australia's.

I've just moved in to a new house so one of the things to do is to get a phone line and internet connection. Firstly you have to read and decipher the various internet and phone plans different providers have on offer and decide which ones suits your needs best and then you have to call them up and wait 30 minutes to speak with one of their representatives. One provider took 10 days just to tell me that Naked DSL was not available in my area! Ten days just to tell me that?

Then I went on to call another service provider who told me that they were not sure if my area was "serviceble" and would call me back after checking with their technical department. They never did call me back. I then proceeded to call another service provider who could not confirm if the fast internet was available or not but we needed to wait about 15 working days to find out! At this point I figured this was getting out of hand and the joke was on me but had to remind myself that some of these internet service providers I was calling were the premier service providers in the country and it was not that my house was located in the middle of the desert or something like that.

I figured I'd give it one last chance and proceeded to call the second largest ISP in Australia. They in turn told me that it seems that the line in my house seem to be connected and there was nothing they could do to override the line. I had to call the line providers to get them to disconnect the line. I then proceeded to call Telstra the largest telco in Australia and they told me they could not disconnect the line to MY HOUSE because of "legal reasons". I was gobsmacked and at this point was ready to send an email to Australia's communications minister to complain. I thought better of that and proceeded to ask the Telstra rep where this left me if the owner did not cancel the line? She effectively told me "you're in the shits then".

I then proceeded to call back the ISP who told me about the connected line and queried if this information he gave me was correct. After some checking and talking with his "boss" I was told that the information he gave about the existing Telstra line was not absolutely accurate and that was an obstacle they could overcome however, a new obstacle cropped up and that it was the fast broadband was not available and only wireless was available! At this point in time I was ready to cry.

He then proceeded to put me on hold again to talk to his "boss" and like magic, the fast internet magically was available again. I proceeded to sign up and we'll see after 10 waorking days if my quest for internet comes to fruition or was just an exercise in futility.

Could you imagine, I was not looking for a heart transplant donor, or doing eye surgery or applying for exclusive share placements. All I wanted was the freaking basic internet connection and I've had to call no less than six ISPs and all of them stuffed me around to my wits end. Some could not provide internet to my area, some did not call me back, some could only provide the slower speeds and almost none of them could provide any accurate information as to the availability of the fast internet connection to my area. As I said I don't live in the desert or the jungles, in fact the school is just 50 metres from my house, so for the life of me can't understand why the infrastructure is not in place to get fast speed internet.

Previously I had used a mobile broadband (wireless) service with two different service providers. The reliability of the connection was terrible and I thought that it was just my area, but having spoken to others who have had similar experiences even with other service providers, I found out I was not unique in this farcical experience. You could imagine having a straight flush in an online internet poker game where money was on the table and not being able to go all in because your internet connection was struggling to get back online. So the computer would automatically fold on your behalf if it didn't receive a response in the stipulated time set. I tried running to re-cycle the power to the modem etc. but it was bordering on ridiculous and gave up altogether. I almost smashed the computer after that experience. Imagine folding on a straight flush!! Can you imagine using online banking and in the middle of a $1 million (I'm just boasting here) international telegraphic transfer the internet line went dead and you could not tell whether the transaction went through or not. Well I could and it happened to me before and I'm not alone on this.

When I say "fast speed" don't get fooled in thinking 50Mbps like Singapore and Korea. I'm only talking fast speed with reference to Australia, which is 20Mbps. Many people in the country areas don't even have internet at all and some are still using dial up. In fact the ISPs are still selling dial up like hot cakes as it seems that that's the most reliable type of internet connection available in Australia. It's nothing less than a joke, that a country whose GPD per capita is in the high $30ks cannot provide basic and high speed broadband connection to its people.